running-effective-1-1s

Running Effective 1:1s

Scope

Covers

• Designing a lightweight 1:1 operating system (purpose, cadence, meeting types, shared docs)
• Running 1:1s as coaching conversations (not just status updates)
• Holding career development conversations (life story → future dreams → action plan)
• Doing basic wellbeing/recovery check-ins (joy/energy) without crossing into therapy/medical advice
• Running skip-levels and special sessions (e.g., post-crisis “make them feel heard” 1:1s)

When to use

• “My 1:1s are turning into status updates—help me redesign them.”
• “Create a 1:1 agenda + shared doc template for me and my direct reports.”
• “I’m a new manager—set up my 1:1 cadence and question bank.”
• “Help me run better career conversations in 1:1s.”
• “Plan a skip-level program and templates.”

When NOT to use

• You need HR/legal guidance, an investigation, or a performance improvement plan (involve HR/legal; use your company process)
• You need a project status meeting cadence (use team/ops rituals; 1:1s should not be the primary status channel)
• The situation involves immediate safety/mental health crisis (seek professional help and follow company policy)
• You want to develop a PM's product skills through structured coaching (use coaching-pms)
• You need to design team-wide meetings, standups, or group rituals (use running-effective-meetings)
• You want to delegate work effectively and track outcomes (use delegating-work)
• You want to manage your relationship upward with your own boss (use managing-up)

Inputs

Minimum required

• Your role and context (manager level, org type, function, time zones)
• Who the 1:1s are for (directs, skip-levels) and relationship stage (new, stable, strained)
• Current 1:1 cadence and what’s not working (2–5 concrete examples)
• What you want to change (coaching, feedback, career growth, wellbeing, alignment, retention)
• Constraints: meeting load, confidentiality/PII rules, any HR policies, time box/deadline